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When you have a farm, suddenly so many terms make sense. Like calling someone a chicken or a pig. You can see why, after you have a chicken and a pig.
Try having a goat.
You know, of the male persuasion.
So many figures of speech are explained.
I thought Rhett and Eclipse might have catatonic seizures after they arrived on our farm. We put them temporarily in the goat pen. They could see–and even lick–the girls through the fence. It drove them insane. These young bucks haven’t seen girls before, but they know what they are and they want them. Bad.
Rhett and Eclipse are both permanent residents at Stringtown Rising Farm, to answer one of several questions following yesterday’s post. Rhett was originally intended to come along with Eclipse as a wether. I thought he was related to Clover and Nutmeg. Turns out, he’s not, so his plans changed. Rhett is smaller than Eclipse though they were born the same week. They are both Cowboy’s babies. As in any breed, there is a natural variation in size. Eclipse is large for a Nigerian Dwarf buck, and Rhett is on the small side. Nigerian Dwarf goats are a miniature breed, and for those who want them as pets, a small buck will make small babies–preferable for pet goats. Eclipse will make bigger babies, and for milkers, that will be preferable. Clover is a larger doe, so she will be bred to Eclipse. At one and a half, Nutmeg is turning out to be a small doe (if you don’t count her voluptuous girth), so she will be bred to Rhett. I think Nutmeg will handle Rhett’s babies more easily.
After letting the boys settle in a bit, I observed Clover’s clear receptiveness to Eclipse.
She let him whisper in her ear.
And lick her.
The tongue action is disgusting! Eclipse had been going nuts all day, making weird clicking noises and grunting and flashing his tongue like a nasty 70′s rock star. AND CLOVER LIKED IT. (The wench!)
Clover: “He’s younger than me. He seems quite energetic. I love me a boy toy!”
In all the nouveau farmer wisdom I possess, I figured we’d just let Clover in the goat pen and that little one (Rhett) would be no bother since it was obvious she and Eclipse had a thing going on and, after, all, Eclipse is bigger and must be top buck. Wow, that little one was on top of Clover faster than you could say horny. He looked like Rat Dog trying to climb Mount Coco. He ended up spending the rest of the afternoon crying at the top of his lungs in the goat house while Clover and Eclipse had a little tryst.
The tryst involved a lot of tongue and other disgusting behavior that I’ll (mostly) spare you.
If I were a better organized farmer, I would have had Nutmeg in the goat house with Rhett, but I’m not, so Rhett will have to await another day to see his love. Not that Nutmeg seems interested, unlike Clover, who couldn’t throw off her haughty attitude fast enough to leap into her lover’s arms. (Wench!)
Everyone watched. They’re all too young to watch.
I’m too young to watch.
I fear for Mr. Pibb’s innocence.
I fear for my innocence.
The grunting and groaning and huffing and spitting and something that sounded like downright sobbing went on for HOURS in the goat pen while Clover and Eclipse shared…..NASTY MOMENTS…..together. It was a warmish evening for January. We sat on the porch and….listened. Because we couldn’t help it. Because everyone in a 10-mile radius had to listen.
Me: “I think we need to get a Bible and read it to them! They need to be saved!”
52: “It’s far, far too late……”
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Everywhere I look around
Love is in the air
Every sight and every sound….”
That song will be in my head all day.
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I can’t wait to see what colorings their babies will have. Cute post.
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Hugs Granny Trace
P.s My power is flickering in and out and the whole time I have been praying please just let me finish the story..lol finished!!
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So glad they are permanent on the farm! Clover will always have her boy toy! No more “renting” for her!
Can’t wait for June! Can’t wait for the milking to begin!
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Jan
Greensboro Daily Photo
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I could so recognize your descriptions of the noises and was laughing out loud! You forgot the funniest whuh, whuh sound though :-)
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Babies on the way now!!! Yea!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Thanks for sharing!
Susan
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Hope you get some babies out of all that racket!
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Cuz if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it
If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it
Don’t be mad once you see that he want it
Cuz if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it
Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Whoa! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Beyonce
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(I don’t know, though…I think I’d get embarrassed listening
)
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Who would think that 2 goats would be so noisy???
Deb
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When we were looking for a male suitor for our goat Tilly my teenaged boys had quite the quick questions and comments….
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I just SPIT iced tea all over my computer desk!!!!! Tears are running down my cheeks…I think I am having a laugh seizure!
(Thank goodness, I finally got my computer back…I have been off-line for a month and I had to go to the library to catch up on Suzanne. Unfortunately, they frown on you spitting tea on their computer screens at the Library! LOL)
Luv it, Suzanne, and luv you, too!
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So, if you are keeping “the boys”, don’t they have to be separated from the girls when their “services” are no longer required? I’ve heard that there is a funny taste to goat’s milk when a buck is kept with the does. Not to mention, I think the does would get a little tired after awhile.
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So, did you and 52 have beer and pretzels while you watched the goat porn, and cigarettes after?
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–sound lIke an R rated barn yard romance novel–who would play thier parts in a human movie version?? Angelina and Brad?
WOW!!
I smell Oscar!!
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Love the fifth picture down. They look like guilty teenagers.
So funny!!
Our nannies should start kidding toward the end of February. Can’t wait.
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Just hilarious!
I can’t wait for little goat babies….
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“relationship”!
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I laughed so hard I nearly wet my pantaloons.
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