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9:57 pm
May 11, 2009
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Ok, so I've been making laundry soap for about a year now (I use Zote, Borax, Washing Soda Recipe), and this past Christmas I thought I would give some family members a jug full as a gift. I had already been making my mom and grandmother some for a few months, so I thought other people might enjoy it too.
Well, I should've suspected something when I gave some to my mother in law Christmas Day and she said "homemade laundry soap? is it going to ruin my clothes?"
Anyways, I got a phone call from my father in law the other day. This is how our conversation went…
Him-"I came across that laundry soap you made us the other day, Lynn's still afraid to use it, so I thought that I would use it on my old rags in case it ruined something. When I picked it up I noticed the jug was leaking, is there anything in there that would make it eat through plastic?"
Me-"I use the soap on all my clothes, it hasn't ruined anything yet. The only ingredients are a bar of soap, borax, and washing soda".
Him-"Well, when I went to pour it out, it wouldn't pour. It became completely solid. How in the world do you use this stuff if you can't pour it, are you supposed to heat the soap to make it liquid before use? I see you wrote "shake well" on your instructions, but I can't shake it."
Me-"I wrote shake well on there because the longer it sits the more gelled it will become. I didn't know it was going to be 4 months before you shook it. I've never had a problem with it.
Him-"How much does it cost to make this soap? We don't want to use it, but I've tried to salvage as much as possible. I sawed the milk jug apart since it wouldn't pour out, and there was some liquid in there. I didn't know if it was safe to pour out or not."
Me-"It costs like 75 cents to make a jug. I don't want it back. If you didn't want to use it, you should've given it back like 3 months ago when it was still usable. Oh, and the liquid was water."
I found the jug and whole blob of laundry soap in the farm dumpster later.
I mean seriously, I go to the trouble of making you something homemade, something I thought you would appreciate, something myself and many other people have been using without problems, and you think it's going to ruin all your clothes? Then you tell me you're scared to use it? At least keep it a secret! I didn't make it with nuclear waste, I made it with 3 ingredients labeled for laundry use!
So anyways, I was just wondering, has anybody else ever had their homemade gifts just completely poo pooed on? It really hurt my feelings that my in laws would think that I would make them something that horrible. I can understand where maybe people wouldn't want other people's canned goods, food, or something like that, but geez! Next year they're getting a homemade lump of coal.
Oh and by the way, everyone else I made the soap for really enjoyed it. So take that in laws! hmph.
10:05 pm
January 9, 2011
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Usually the older people get the more they appreciate the efforts of others. Your in-laws were rude. But that is them, not you. You were thoughtful. Keep that and move past the rest.
And yes, I made homemade dog biscuits for all the dog owners I work with. I asked one person (you know I should NEVER ask!) if his dog liked it and he laughed and said his dog thought they were "weird". Moving on!
10:10 pm
September 20, 2010
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A couple of years ago at Christmas I made up cookie mix's in jars, they turned out so cute, I used quart mason jars and had very nice labels with directions for them, all ingredients were high quality, well I had given one to my Brother in law who is a bachelor now, thought it would be nice for him and easy to make, well he never used it. Last time I was up at the house we were helping him pack up to move, it was still in the cupboard.
10:14 pm
September 20, 2010
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Steph, don't take it personally, some people just don't appreciate homemade gifts, I luv em! if you want to send me some laundry soap, I will use it!! I also make homemade soap and gave it out this year as gifts, I know that some of my family members really did not appreciate it, they have no idea what goes into making soap and could care less. Maybe they thought the soap would burn them, who knows, more for me and my family. Some people are not as creative as we are.
10:46 pm
February 10, 2009
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I've given eggs to people and later found out they threw them out because they were afraid to use them. They came from hens, not the grocery store!!! 
10:51 pm
October 18, 2010
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Hmmm, maybe that's why I never get a thank-you from certain relatives that I mail homemade Christmas goodies to!They probably hate them and throw them away and are ashamed to tell me…
Maybe I won't send them anything this year…
11:28 pm
February 22, 2010
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One of my friends made a baby quilt she thought might be a heirloom one day…she found it in the dog house a few years later! Mercy sakes!
12:24 am
April 3, 2011
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In mentioning that I have canned (pressure) elk, chicken and beef, I usually hear–"uh! Don't give me any of that. Is it safe?" Only once has anyone expressed an interest. Folks have no problems with jams and jellies though.
12:45 am
March 31, 2011
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Every year for Christmas my Grandma would each grandchild an assortment of canned goods. Everyone would sneak them in my car because they knew that I would use them. Of course I didn't mind, but I can't imagine how hurt G-ma would be if she found out. I'll take homemade over store bought any day.
5:25 am
October 17, 2008
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There are many people that just don't have the appreciation of homemade gifts. I can never understand it….I would appreciate anything handmade over store-bought. But it takes everyone I guess.
I give out homemade gifts all the time….find some in cupboards later. I'm pretty direct now. "Are you going to use this?" If they say no or are hesitant, I put it in a bag and take it home! THAT may be rude in itself, but if we're close enough that I can go through their cupboards, I can ask them a direct question.
Think on the bright side, Steph, THAT's how concentrated gelled laundry soap is made. Leave it sit! 
6:21 am
July 24, 2010
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Yea, me too!! One year for Christmas, my mother wanted a blanket to use in her den. I went to the fabric store and picked out two very pretty and coordinating pieces of fleece to go with the colors in the den. I planned to make one of those fringed and tied blankets. I measured how long I thought it would need to be to comfortable/adequately cover her in the recliner. I got sick with a bad sinus infection, but I had to finish that blanket before we went home for Christmas. I cut the fringe, blew my nose, tied some knots, blew my nose, tied some more knots, took some Tylenol, tied some knots, blew my nose some more…you get the picture.
Got it done, took it to her. She unwrapped it during the gift exchange, thanked me for it and laid it aside.
The next time I went home, she was using a piece of fleece just like the backing of the blanket I made. Turns out, she thought the tied blanket was "too heavy", so she cut the knotted fringe and seperated the peices of fleece. Told me she tried to untie the knots, but there were too many. Then she gave me back the peice of fleece that she wasn't using.
Oh well!!!
7:59 am
January 9, 2011
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Oh my, JudyDee. You took that with good humour!
8:35 am
December 8, 2010
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I look foward to the gifts my sister used to give me, but when she started taking care of mother no one gets any anymore. I am bummed, I loved her gifts.
I have a neighbor whom I have given to that has 7 children. I think she is a thrower also, but one year I gave her a photo I took and framed for her and she actually put it on her wall. I was BLESSED she did that.
10:20 am
July 22, 2010
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Oh my! I understand this, completely! I found something I had made my adult daughter in her pile to go to the Salvation Army. . . . I thought it would be passed down to her daughter, then grand-child, etc. I was hurt . . . but, I've learned. I don't just GIVE anymore. I ask what they would like (home made). Since I've been doing that – I've had lots of requests for simple things – which really surprised me. Most of my family has asked for crocheted pot holders to match their kitchens! Isn't that crazy? By the way – when we had our CITR Handmade Christmas exchange, I was THRILLED with my gift – all of it was home canned goods and we ate every bit of it (except for the sugar scrub – I've used almost all of it too). And you know what – we didn't get sick or die from the home canned goods! I'll take anything home made over store bought, anytime!
10:53 am
January 21, 2011
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Thing is, anything home made is safer than store bought, period! Even dog food is safer home made… You can't control or know what all goes into store bought, but you can home made.
11:48 am
April 12, 2010
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I think that a negative response from people we gift to just comes out of ignorance of homemade things. We can get anything we want from the store and we assume it's safe because the government puts a stamp of approval on it, so we wonder how anything homemade could be as safe as that. I had posted about a very old friend who gave me honey and I never used it, and you all answered my questions and now I happily use it. I was just ignorant of the facts. But there's no reason for the recipient to be rude and ask if it's safe like that, as if you'd give them something unsafe. There are more tactful ways to become informed. Like this forum! lol Well, listen, when push comes to shove and things get so expensive people are really hurting, they'll happily want your homemade things then.
12:40 pm
March 21, 2010
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A few years ago I made some neckcoolers that I made with different colorful materials and the water holding granules you can add to potting soil. They are nice to use when working in the yard, gardening or any chore you may be doing on a hot summer day. I gave them to family and friends and sold alot of them at festivals to people looking for relief from the heat. We even used them when trail riding on hot days. Anyway,………. one day my MIL was visiting and my husband was showing one to her. She immediately said "Well, I wouldn't want one of those if you gave it to me." I did hold my tongue, but in my mind I was thinking "And I wouldn't give you one if you were having a heat stroke dear" I envy those of you that have a good relationship with your MIL, but after years of this kind of treatment, I have learned to just hold my tongue alot and mostly just avoid contact as much as possible.
1:40 pm
January 17, 2011
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I don't give too many homemade items…mostly jelly! But I've never run into anything where someone didn't use it. I even had one gal ask me, "If I return the empty jar can I get a refill?" I thought that was the best compliment I could have gotten!
I made fire starters one year & gave to everyone with a fireplace…but they were in cute little baskets with ribbons so they could just use them for decor if they wanted…one guy wanted to know how to make them, said they were the handiest things he had ever used!
All the family gets Amish Friendship Cakes for Christmas and a few of our customers/friends get whole wheat banana/nut bread. So far, they all look forward to it! DH's brothers always ask if I am making the cakes yet? 
I would be hurt too if I found out someone didn't use an item I gave them. So I have learned from seeing what has happened with others to ask first…not directly, but in a round about way. It has saved me some effort over the years. I know my picky Japanese DIL wouldn't use any homemade laundry soap, so I don't even bother asking her. She won't even use the same kind of commercial laundry detg. I've had over the years…mine didn't cost enough so it couldn't be good! ((eye roll))
1:50 pm
February 6, 2011
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I always find our gifts to my in-laws at their garage sales. I decided to start personalizing them so they couldn't sell them or return them. One mother's day, I bought a really cute concrete statue of a little country boy. I painted it and it turned out really nice. Then I made an inscription on the bottom, "Love, your Son". (this way it didn't have anything to do with me- the wicked DIL
). She opened it, said it was nice, and asked if we could keep it in OUR garden. It is still here. At least we really like it. We have since gone to not giving her gifts or when she insists on a gift, we give her a gift card or plant her a tree—on our property and tell her about it. My husband thinks those are the best gifts–the ones we get to keep. It hurts my feelings, but then I remind myself that that is the way she is and I try to make the best of it. She just doesn't get "my best" anymore. She gets my husband's "good enough" now. For me it was less about the gift and more about the thought and time going into getting the "perfect" gift for someone who never appreciated it.
3:46 pm
February 8, 2009
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Wow Steph it is almost a welcome to the club here….I have in laws like that..and it took me many years to accept the this..you know, they are my husbands parents..I married their son..not them.
Believe me I tried, now I ignore them, don't even talk on the phone with them.
I don't buy them gifts, don't send them cards..and if I do..I only put my husbands name on it..not mine.
Than they are sooo happy with a card from their son
If that makes them happy…I couldn't care less.
Just don't make them anymore home made gifts….I like the idea of planting a tree in MY garden and tell them they have trees here and that i will look after them
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