I Just Want TWO Tablespoons of Milk, Is That Too Much To Ask?


Milking, Day Three.

Me: “Clover, I want more than one tablespoon of milk.”

Clover: “Where is my makeup artist and my personal stylist?”


I believe, in fact, that I have identified the problem.

Make that TWO problems.

The babies are taking all my–


“Honey???? What is that on your head, Honey? WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH YOU?”

“THOSE ARE HORNS! Did we not just have you disbudded for the second time, Honey?”


“Okay. I know. Kids today. They are out of control. Witness the fact that they keep taking all your milk.”

Plan B. Or are we on Plan T? I can’t remember.

We’ve tried figuring this every which way. We can’t get the babies separated from Clover. They are still so little they can slip through the wire when we try to put Clover in the night pen to get her away from them for a few hours. They don’t like to be separated from mama. They will contort themselves until they squeeze in there. We could put more, even smaller, wire on the night pen, but we are some fenced-out people and if you show us any more fencing material, our heads might explode. If we wait a few more weeks, the babies will eventually get too big to squeeze through. Yes, I’m lazy. I won’t go to Ohio for a milk bucket, either!! I also don’t want to even attempt to separate them at night. That sounds heartbreaking. They would all be so upset. I’m too sappy to be a farmer!! (I don’t know what we’re doing about Honey’s re-re-sprouting horns either, by the way.)

I’m only trying to milk Clover once a day, in the evenings, so as to leave the morning milk for the babies. They’re five weeks old, so they do still need her milk. But they don’t need ALL of it!!! I just want a little in the evening……. Then as the babies get older, I’ll start milking her twice a day. But the babies aren’t even leaving me that much, one milking!

So I tried giving an extra feed ration in mid-afternoon, straight to the babies. They ate. Then they climbed under Clover anyway……. So maybe right now, until they get older, I’m just milking Clover for practice, to get Clover used to being milked, to get used to milking myself. Or maybe I’m just milking her BECAUSE I’M INSANE. Because I love filling my fridge with little jam jars with a tablespoon of milk each.

But can’t I have more than one tablespoon? Is TWO tablespoons too much to ask?!

Day Three, Clover scampered onto the milkstand and stuck her face in her food.

She kicked me a little.

And tried to sit on the pail.

I perservered.

See my “chore” boots? Oh. Where ARE my chore boots?

Princess wasn’t wearing chore boots, either.

No wonder this goat doesn’t take us seriously.

Then Princess wanted to try.

All right! She wants to milk! I’m all about having a backup. This milking thing is hard.



  1. Carolyn A. says:

    Where’s your milking stool? I think you’d get a much better result with one. It will change the “pull” on things. ๐Ÿ™‚ xxoo

  2. Beckynsc says:

    Hang in there, Suzanne! We have the confidence in you, that you shall overcome all obstacles!

  3. wkf says:

    Maybe a taller milking stand so you aren’t wallowing around.
    and a stool, like C said. Boy when you get the hang of this you are going to have cheese coming out of your ears.
    You know it is totally ok to just have goats. You can use them for weed eating.
    I can’t wait to see a full pail.

  4. Blaze says:

    Well at least you ahve made progress!

    Though that is weird with his horns coming back yet again.
    Stubborn little fella ain’t he?
    I thought having them de-budded took care of that for good.
    Well maybe third times a charm?

  5. Kathy R says:

    I feel sorry for the babies, too. When are they ever going to be closer to mama than now before they are weaned. Childhood is so short anyway. At least your family isn’t dying of hunger while waiting for the cheese. All in good time…meanwhile, practice, practice, practice!

  6. Kathy R says:

    And after a second look, I think a taller milking platform is called for. You are going to be doing this twice a day for a very long time — might as well be comfortable. (Our backs aren’t getting any younger, are they?) If that makes the stand too tall for Clover to climb onto, what about a little ramp? Just a thought. (Oh, my aching back!)

  7. kacey says:

    I think it’s the lack of chore boots. No one takes a woman seriously without her farmgirl boots on! :yes:

  8. Gail says:

    You will need to separate the kids from Clover in the next few weeks anyway to wean them, so you will need some type of fencing for that. Keeping them apart during the night
    at first is more humane than weaning them cold turkey, plus there won’t be any decrease in milk production. If the babies aren’t nursing, Clover’s milk will dry up. With them nursing part time while you milk in the morning, you will keep the milk production going. The voice of experience speaking, and whose goats milk supply dried up! Live and learn!

  9. Lisa L says:

    I think you are doing great! Of course I don’t know a thing about goats. LOL! But I do believe you milked a little tiny drop or two more out of her than yesterday…that has to count for something. And those babies are so sweet!!

  10. Gizmo says:

    You’re doing great!!!! :clap: AND, Princess too!!! Before you know it, 52 won’t need to hold her up. :mrgreen:
    It’s all about the boots… :rotfl: Milking is when crocks come in VERY handy.
    I agree with Gail…..you will need to milk her at least once per day (preferrably every 12 hours) — or she will dry up. You will be AMAZED at the amount of milk those two little ones were “stealing” from you.

  11. Donna says:

    Wow, look up there at Clover’s bottom eyelashes – I would kill for eyelashes like that! LOL
    Well, we can now see 52’s lower best! Ha!
    Suzanne is that a black toenail I see with your sandalls? Did Clover step on your toe? (smile)At least you have sandalls on and are not barefoot like last picture!
    It’s really funny – you’ll get there…these are all memories in the making – one day you’ll have a good amt. of milk! I cannot believe Honey’s buds are grown again!!!!
    One day there WILL be goat cheese – I just know it! I can smell that pizza now, with the goat cheese, sliced tomatoes, Basil…olive oil…sauce…mmmmmmm!

  12. Shari C says:

    Don’t give up…you will eventually become accomplished at this and have all the goat milk you need to make cheese…honest. I have faith in your determination…or is it stubbornness to succeed…ha,ha.

  13. Dru says:

    I was also going to ask about sitting on a milk stool. Will that help a bit?

    I think you’re doing a great job at milking Clover.

  14. Suzanne McMinn says:

    I have a bucket to use as a stool but I forgot to bring it in there last night!

    That’s toenail polish, by the way, LOL.

  15. Jill S. says:

    LOL, they have your number don’t they.

  16. Suzette says:

    Oh, Suzanne! I’m so sorry…I didn’t mean to laugh.

    I know it’s hard. But, you’ve got to admit…it’s also very funny. Not so funny, if your poor, starving family was waiting for that milk. But, as it is…funny, funny, funny.

    Are Honey’s horns a hormonal thing? I’ve forgotten…does he still even HAVE hormones? So much to keep up with on your farm!

  17. Remudamom says:

    I really think you need a taller milking station too. When I milked my goat she hopped on the ridge thingy on the side of the horse trailer, and I didn’t have to lean over. Hubby would walk by on his way to milk the cow and wish that she could fit up there too.

    Didn’t they come to you in a big dog carrier? Was that yours? Are the babies too big to sleep in that at night?

    I had it easier than you because my poor little goatie miscarried, and I started milking her the next day. She decided I was her baby, and nothing made her happier than for me to milk her. She would escape her pen, come to the house and go from window to window, peering in to find me.

  18. Suzanne McMinn says:

    I was just thinking I might try putting the babies in the pet carrier at night. We can’t build another, separate night pen at this point and we need to make sure both Clover and her babies are in the night pen where they’re safe at night. I might try that.

  19. J says:

    My Old Man used to milk goats. In fact that was his first paying job at 16yrs old. He said the best way is to sit behind her bringing your knees close into her legs, your arms as if hugging her rear end, reaching your hands around to her udder, this helps reach the teats better, have your pail sitting to the side you don’t want it directly under her udder and you angle the teat out to the side to squirt into the milk pail. He said it’s not like milking a cow. You can milk like a cow but goats do better this way. Hope this works for you. :hug:

  20. Doris says:

    Years ago when I milked goats, I stood them on a square bale of hay. It was easier and I did not have to stoop so low.I never did have anyone to help me by holding them. Could be she won’t let her milk down because of too many people around ? Too much distraction ? And, of course the babies need to be away from her for a while so they don’t get all the milk.Good luck ! Don’t give up ! You and she will both learn. She is new at this too. lol

  21. Netherfieldmom says:

    Seems like the less you milk and the less they eat, the less milk will be produced…once it goes, it’s gone, so start milking her more to replace what they’re not taking in. ‘Cause I know you don’t have anything better to do that wrassle a goat several times a day! Love your blog!

  22. Brenda@CoffeeTeaBooks&Me says:

    I have always wanted to move even further out in the country than I do now and have some animals. I’m thinking where I live now is just fine, cats are easier than goats. :biggrin:

    By the way, I’m sure the place they are talking about in Ohio must be Lehmans. They have a catalog, which I love to drool over. Perhaps that bucket would be just what the goat ordered?


  23. Suzanne, the Farmer's Wife says:

    If you follow this link to my photobucket account, you’ll see a picture of someone milking a goat at our local county fair.

    She’s sitting and milking. Perhaps you need to relax and become THE GOAT WHISPERER!!!
    The pack leader, the milk maid.


    – Suzanne, the Farmer’s Wife

  24. cgReno says:

    This site is my favorite spot on earth. I look forward to a new adventure with Princess and clan McMinn, dogs, goats, chickens and cooking school every morning. I know that in the same spot I would be running a rest home for aging animals, sappy city girl turned country fool. Thank you for sharing your world and adventures!

  25. Susan says:

    I think Honey is going to be the trouble maker of the two Kids. You just keep on trying and Clover is bound to give in. Does 52 realize he is giving us a little more of a glimpse? I for one am giving him a big :thumbsup:!

  26. Jo says:

    Perhaps a picture on that brick wall would distract Clover?
    Hey that’s not a wedding ring on 52’s hand is it??

  27. Suzanne McMinn says:

    No, that’s not a wedding ring! ๐Ÿ˜†

  28. Katharina says:

    New things can be so weird! I’m sure everyone will eventually fall into a routine.

    Good luck with the next debudding too.

  29. sunnid755 says:

    :wave: thanks for sharing and good luck!

  30. Jean says:

    I love your milkstand – what a great idea to put roofing material on it for good traction for the goats. I think I had one board that was longer, the very first one next to the front of the stand. It came out about a foot longer so I could sit on it and lean my shoulder into the goat’s shoulder. I was facing toward the back of the goat. That helped stop the kicking. Good luck!

  31. Jean says:

    Suzanne’s link shows the way to face the back end of the goat. The milkmaid here is sitting on the edge of the milkstand. She has her chore boots on, too! You all make me laugh – what a great way to start the day. Thank you.

  32. Debbie in Memphis says:

    You’re doing great! Way to go Princess! Before long you’ll both be milking experts.

  33. dlyn says:

    I’ve been waiting for a twitter update on the milking – this is way better ๐Ÿ™‚

  34. Shimmy Mom says:

    Taking care of animals is hard. You can’t baby the babies like we want to do. Hang in there, you’ll get the hang of it, the babies will get older and you’ll get a little tougher on them. I can’t believe his horns are budding again!

  35. Suzanne McMinn says:

    Yes, I noticed her “chore boots” too! She looks so confident, LOL. She’s sitting there listening to music. That’s a BIG goat in that picture, too!

  36. catslady says:

    Who would have thought goats could be so ineresting :yes: Maybe Honey should keep her horns – surely he’s so sweet he wouldn’t use them :mrgreen:

  37. catslady says:

    and I wish I could type – interesting! I’m blaming it on the nail tips I had put on for my daughter’s wedding – they’re impossible :shocked:

  38. Maureen says:

    You always have such great recipes that I’m sure you will come up with a great one for a tablespoon of goat milk.

  39. Terry says:

    Oh Suzanne, thank you so much for the great feeling I get after reading about your adventures. Keep practicing and you girls will get into the rhythm and you will have enough milk to share.

  40. Joanne says:

    here’s hoping for THREE tablespoons tomorrow ๐Ÿ˜‰

  41. Teresa H. says:

    one of these days you’ll get more milk…and one of these days a picture of 52 will come creeping in too! :rotfl:

  42. Stephanie says:

    I don’t know the first thing about milking anything (surprising since my grandparents owned a dairy farm) but I love learning right along with you… And I think it’s all about the chore boots too.

  43. Brandy says:

    I have no idea how to milk a goat, but you’ve gotten some good advice today! Good luck with weaning the babies and re-re-dehorning Honey.

  44. Jodie says:

    Practice makes perfect. Or maybe not. :sheepjump:

  45. Stephanie says:

    If you’ve already done the disbudding twice, I’d seriously consider leaving them alone. I’m biased, of course, because all my nigies have horns. I have 11, and no one has ever been hurt by their horns.

  46. Amy says:


    I think Clover’s just havin’ a little fun with you.

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