In Which I Am Smarter Than the Rooster


You want a piece of me? Go ahead, see me coming and rush into the chicken house, Mean Rooster!
Wait for me in there. You’re so predictable. You think I’m not on to you?
I’ve got your number. I know what you want. You want to STAB ME WITH YOUR STEELY BEAK while I try to collect eggs. Not this time, Mean Rooster.
I don’t even want to go into your stupid old chicken house.
You can have it.
It’s all yours! How odd. You don’t seem to want to be in there, either, unless I’m in there.
Oh, what’s this?
It’s the door between the chicken house and the chicken yard. Not that I’m interested in that or scheming or anything.
I’m walking away. I’m gone. I’m a dot, a vapor trail, a speck on the horizon. No need to keep yourself poised to rush back into the chicken house.
You just go on and do something else and I’ll just– HA!
I got the eggs, I got the eggs!!!!
Too bad, so sad, Mean Rooster. See ya, wouldn’t want to be ya!
Okay, I’m leaving now…..


  1. Patty says:

    HAHA!! Good for you Suzanne!! :shimmy:

  2. Darlene says:

    Whoo Hoo!! Good for you!!:shimmy:
    Glad you can get your eggs.
    And when he figures out that you’re going to take the eggs and starts running in the house, just put their feed out. He’ll go for the feed and forget about you….well, that’s the theory, anyway. lol

  3. Esther says:

    Suzanne you SO MUCH make my day :snoopy: . You are genuine and original. Please don’t ever stop.

  4. Kathie says:

    He is a good rooster, protecting his hens…even though he does not have to. Are any of your hens sitting?

    • Suzanne McMinn says:

      The banty sits on the nest sometimes, and also one of the other hens has been spotted sitting on it, but I don’t think any of them are sitting on it regularly yet. If they don’t start soon, I think I’ll have to clear out the eggs and start the nest over because I’m afraid the eggs will go bad. (None of the eggs are banty eggs, but that banty likes to sit in the nest!)

  5. Jan @ Greensboro Daily Photo says:

    Dear SM:

    Is there such thing as a nice rooster? LOL. Everyone I know who has ever had one has mean rooster stories to tell. They must be territorial. Does he attack visitors?

  6. Cece says:

    I adore starting my mornings with a giggle and you definitely help that. The last picture of the rooster scares me. LOL So glad you “fixed” him for the time being.


  7. Kathryn says:

    *cue music from ‘Deliverance’*

    That rooster is something else!

  8. Fencepost says:

    Way to outsmart the rooster,Oh, but does he look ticked off!

  9. CindyP says:

    πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜†

    A huge laugh to start my day!! Thank you!! Hmmm, might want to start now thinking of a greater outsmarting of the mean ol’ rooster, it looks like he’s got evil in his eye!

    I am so drooling over those chicken n’ biscuits!! :hungry:
    RECIPE! RECIPE! Even in “Just Recipes”, please? :heart:

  10. Nancy in Atlanta says:

    Ha! That’s our Suzanne – she can outsmart a rooster!! That will fix him – for now, anyway!! If he keeps trying to stab you, threaten him with this: :dancingmonster:

  11. Nita in South Carolina says:

    That last pictures scares me too!

  12. trish says:

    that last stare is pure evil.
    have you tried winning him over with baked goods?????

  13. MaryLundShu says:

    Hey Suzanne,

    HIL-LARI_OUS!! That last shot gives me the willies.
    Just curious, are you remotely considering sending him on to greener chicken yards (as was suggested before)?

  14. IowaDeb says:

    Way to go Suzanne ,you outsmarted that birdbrain,but be very careful he looks like he’s plotting revenge! πŸ˜†

  15. wkf says:

    You made me laugh! Do you throw scratch out in the chicken yard to keep him occupied. Chickens are greedy. Even if they have already eaten, he’ll run ove to get it so no one else does. The
    chickens would like a cookie too. :happyfeet:

  16. Gail says:

    Good for you Suzanne! I thought I had out smarted mine, but even with the leaf rake, the nasty fowl got me. He broke the skin on
    both my legs and drew blood…that was through my jeans! Hubby and I talked again about letting him “free range”, but are afraid that he is so mean he’d probably survive predators, and stalk out house
    keeping us hostage inside! I felt like killing him yesterday, but I don’t think I have it in me. However…if during the course of nature, a predator should get him, well, that would be different.

  17. Joanna Wilcox says:

    I’ve had a couple of roosters like that. The two that I have now are very passive so that’s nice. Each roo has his own personality.

  18. Christine says:

    ROTFL! Been there. Done that. Congratulations on a successful egg heist.

  19. IowaCowgirl says:

    That boy has PLANS brewing. Watch your back.

  20. The Retired One says:

    Wow, look at his RED eyes! I would be afraid of him, and probably make cereal for breakfast, instead.

  21. Matthew Burns says:

    “Revenge is Sweet” so sayeth the Rooster.

  22. BuckeyeGirl says:

    I’ve had nice roos. It’s funny though how sometimes they’ll be nice to some people but fasten that evil eye on another person, and for no good reason at all! What’s up with that? Maybe he thinks you’re part of his flock so he wants to prove you’re “not the boss of him” but he is of you.

    They don’t call them bird brains for nuthin’ though!

  23. monica says:

    Sounds like a great art heist or OO7! He has to protect his girls! :hug: Increase the stealth and he will be so bewildered, maybe he will give up. Let the man think he is in control and you can have anything you want.

  24. Treasia/TruckersWife says:

    It’s funny how the rooster really does look mad at your.

  25. Melissa Marsh says:

    LOVE IT. The rooster has been outsmarted!

  26. Melissa Marsh says:

    Suzanne, my blog post for today focused on your blog. Hope you don’t mind, but it’s a public “thank you” to you for helping me find my own happiness. πŸ™‚

  27. Bobbie says:

    Good going-keep that rooseter wondering what your up to. Does he expect you should get nothing in return for feeding & watering him and his ladies? Sounds just like a male. Hugs, Bobbie

  28. trish says:

    I knew it! I knew you could not hurt that rooster. Outsmarting him was much more funny anyway. Loved this blog!!

  29. Teri says:

    I had to laugh because I read your post title about you being smarter than the mean rooster and then immediately read the photo of the day title about the yummy Chicken and biscuits and of course my natural asumption was…..well you know! Glad you figured out something else for the meanie! I have had to pick my roosters up and carry them around with me to let them know I am boss. I have done this from the time they were chicks and now they are friendly. If my Barred Rock (he is the head honcho) shows the least bit of aggression, I scoop him up and carry him around like a football while I do chores. He hates being restricted and away from his ladies. But you have to show NO Fear when you start doing this.

  30. Marley Delarose says:

    You. Are. Certified. I’ve missed your blog while my internet’s been down. Uh, does that make me crazy? Such is life. :dancingmonster:

  31. catslady says:

    LOL that seems like such an easy and simple solution – why didn’t we all think of that lol.

  32. Claudia says:

    Way to out smart the rooster Suzanne!Thanks for today’s farmhouse picture…. I was wondering what to fix tonight. That looks fantastic and I have some leftover chicken. I bet that old rooster is out there justa grumbling!

  33. Estella says:

    What a great solution to mean rooster!

  34. Susan says:

    Suzanne, you are my heroine! :heart:

  35. Brandy says:

    That last picture is hilarious!

  36. Joanne says:

    Wow, that’s one formidable guard protecting the chicken house there! Loved the saga today.

  37. Sharon says:

    Suzanne – have you ever heard the old addage “Walk softly and carry a big stick”? Rooster attacks can become very ugly. I nearly lost an eye and an ear while trying to be kind and feed that ungreatful character. Be careful, he WILL get you.

  38. SuzieQ says:

    Hysterical laughing scaring the dogs… :snoopy: :snoopy:

  39. Organizing Mommy says:

    hilarious! Great photography and fun.

  40. jean says:

    That guy is giving me the stink eye. I’m scared.

  41. Suzy says:

    Man, he is one MEAN rooster!!!He’s giving you and your camera the evil eye!!

  42. tillie says:

    ungrateful rooster! tell it to him straight just like spartacus…”prepare to die”

  43. kritter keeper says:

    mean rooster is funny! he adds so much character to your farm and blogs. carrying him around like a football is hilarious! i put cricket in ‘love jail’ too which is the same behavior modification technique. some alpha males are a pain to put up with but usually they are worth the trouble.

  44. DeeBee says:

    That last picture of that mean old rooster is the meanest picture by far. Makes me laugh. πŸ™‚

  45. Brandy G says:

    What a gorgeous looking rooster.
    Mean or not, he is beautiful!

  46. Erika says:

    Get Coachin Roosters.
    I love my boys and they are friendly and have never attacked. They are really good boys and take active roles with abbaies and the hens.
    Mr. Mean Roo would end up in the freezer, actually just did that a while a go with a few exotic roos that decided to try and get us and my kids. I know harsh but a roo that will take on people isn’t safe. years ago we tried, and allowed one to free range and he was always right there to get us, lol

  47. 4rum says:

    It would seem that I am not the only one cherishing the euphoria of dementia … the soothing escape … the high of the surreal … the shear glee of winning the insignificant, but able to recognize that significance … you have reached the next level Suzanne … the pinnicle is near … within reach … stretch … reeeaaach … gnash your teeth and it can be yours … omlets for breakfast ?

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