The Shame of It All


I love floppy-eared goats.

Sheep in electric pink.

And squeaky clean sleeping pigs.

This weekend is the Black Walnut Festival here. It means parades, funnel cake, animals at the 4-H barn, and more funnel cake.

A great emphasis should be put on the funnel cake.

I was on my way to take Morgan to the start of the Black Walnut Festival on Friday when she got a call from her friend and my cousin’s son’s girlfriend, Amanda, that we needed to stop by the 4-H barn so that Morgan could braid her hair before she showed her calf. I don’t require a lot of excuses to stop by the 4-H barn every year to see the animals, so this wasn’t a terrible nuisance.

This is Amanda. Look at the rosy cheeks, the smile, the dimples.

We think Madison should marry her. I DIDN’T SAY THAT. Don’t tell Madison. But if he doesn’t marry her, I’m going to.

Anyway. Here’s Amanda’s calf. A six-month-old 500-pound Angus heifer.

After we got there, Amanda told Morgan, “I didn’t really want you to braid my hair. I just wanted you to come see my calf.”

Amanda’s lucky I have a thing for pink piggy ears.

While we were there, I couldn’t help noticing….

….something about all the calves. THEY ALL HAD HALTERS.

All these CHILDREN. Who can put HALTERS ON THEIR CALVES. And yet I can’t.

The shame of it all.


Me: “When are you coming to put a halter on my calf?”

Amanda: “You have a calf?”

Me: “YOU KNOW I HAVE A CALF. When are you coming to put a halter on her?”

Amanda: “I don’t know…..”

But I do.

Oh, yes, I do.

I’m gonna tell her I need her to come braid my hair….


  1. bonita says:

    Those dimples seem to say Amanda is nice, helpful, and will take pity on a farmer who has not yet put a halter on her ooh so cute but wildly independent calf. Yes, Amanda looks like the kind of teenager that doesn’t need to be bribed to do a good deed. But just in case, can you lure her with cookies?

  2. Mandy says:

    haha for a minute I thought that pig was Sausage or Patty.

    So many calves! Hope you can bribe Amanda to come and get that Halter on GB

  3. Beth @ Moose In My Yard says:

    This reminds me so much or our Youth Show when I was growing up. We had a special fair in my tiny home town that was for kids 18 and under. I lived for the Youth Show each summer. I would ride my bike there every day for that week, except for the day of the horse show, then I rode my horse in to show it. I LOVE fairs…

  4. texwisgirl says:

    You might need to convince ALL those cute teens to come over and wrassle Glory Bee into a halter – not just sweet Amanda! :cowsleep:

  5. Liz in Wis says:

    You’re so funny 🙂

  6. Linda Segerson says:

    Love the animals and it is obvious you have too much fun with them. Ok, I am jealous, wish I could get my husband interested in farm animals so I can have them. I want goats, sheep, maybe a cow or two or any of the above. Keep having fun!! 🙂

  7. Zusiqu says:

    After reading this, I got the giggles.

  8. Lisa says:

    That sleeping pig is cute.

  9. claudia w says:

    Amanda is adorable!
    I love that sign in the background…”Meet coffee She’s de calf”
    Witty 4-H’ers!
    Gosh I miss those fairs. Ours out here are all so danged commercial, most of the people who go miss the purpose. (Except for the kids, they still have their goals.)

  10. Tina says:

    This was a very cute and funny post. Amanda has such a wholesome-ness about her, and Morgan is a stunner! I laughed at Bonita’s post–maybe you could bribe her with cookies! Ha! Heck, I would come give calf-haltering a try for some cookies! Good luck with Glory Bee…

  11. lavenderblue says:

    That final picture of Amanda….priceless. “You have a calf…” Gotta love those teenagers.

    Of course, I know there’ll be plenty of pictures when Amanda comes to calf wrassle. What is life without embarrassing teens.

  12. BuckeyeGirl says:

    Girl. Bribe some of those kids to come help you SOON!!!

  13. Barbee says:

    Ha, ha, ha, it might work. Darling girls. Really fun post. If a cookie bribe doesn’t work, try ginger bread with real whipped cream.

  14. Ang. says:

    I love fairs! I had such a great time as kid showing my pigs. Now, is this an FFA fair or a 4-H fair? I see lots of FFA jackets and a 4-H tie.

  15. Mary says:

    See!! Right there!!! That’s what we like to read!!! Incorporate those unexpected little stories in amongst your daily duties on the farm and your “daily duties” with your kids and we’ll buy the book. Honest we will. Loved the story! Excuse me, but a cookbook just does not show off your Gift for Writing.

  16. Jessica says:

    LOL I just love your humor.

    This post brings back memories! I raised a steer in 4-H, and pet rabbits. My great uncle is a cowboy, still. He was the one that talked me into joining his 4-H Steer group… and the thing tried to kill me by dragging me through his property. The lead rope was around my neck… My uncle had put the rope around my waist while we were training the steer to walk with me on a lead. I don’t know why he did that. The steer bolted and I tried to get the rope off me and didn’t get it off in time. The rope was around my neck and I was drug about 50 feet and up a pipe step that was embedded in the ground. My uncle ran after and stopped the steer, he’s quite strong. He thought I was dead. I did learn something that day… firemen and paramedics are CUTE! Thankfully I came home from the hospital alive and nothing broken.

    I have a photo somewhere of me and the steer at the county fair. His name was Sunshine (uncle named him for me).

  17. Vicki in So. CA says:

    Another good morning chuckle from you! Love them.

    You mentioned you were gonna try and get a halter on GB last weekend. Now, I know you’d show us a *tada* picture if it happened. There hasn’t been one, so I’m assuming you were foiled again by that frisky baby. I bet she even stuck her tongue out at you! It may take some help from Amanda, Morgan, or 52 (or all of the above) but you can do it! Maybe while she’s sleeping? :cowsleep:

  18. Cousin Sheryl says:

    Our Black Walnut Festival Show and Sale is a combined 4-H and FFA event. There were over 50 calves, at least 30 sheep, probably 4- hogs and 20 goats. Amanda’s calf was a little wild and didn’t win a top prize but she sold the heifer at the sale for a nice “college fund” bolus. Our Amanda just won FIRST place in the statewide FFA Agronomy contest. Congratulations, Amanda!

    She is a sweet girl! Both she and Morgan are totally fabulous!

  19. Cousin Sheryl says:

    PS – That’s “40” hogs.

    I am glad that my son, Madison, is dating Amanda. I wish Amanda a lot of luck in “handling” my son! LOL

  20. Jo says:

    I agree with Mary above, this is why we love reading what you write….witty, unexpected, fun, just being yourself. I agree that a cookbook would be nice and I would definitely buy one, but it wouldn’t show your GIFT FOR WRITING.! :fairy: :happyflower:

  21. bonita says:

    I was looking at the pix a second time and was going to ask “Did the heifer win a ribbon?” But I take it from Cousin Sheryl’s comment that that’s the First for Agronomy. Then, I had to go to the dictionary and look up agronomy…I’m such a city girl!
    (agronomy n. Application of the various soil and plant sciences to soil management and crop production; scientific agriculture.) Congrats to Amanda!

  22. samantha says:

    Morgan is beautiful! You better get a big stick for those boys.

    I have a Morghyn too, but we used a Irish spelling, I love that name for girls.

  23. EBet says:

    I love fair time, pink pigs and floppy eared goats, I just bought myself one yesterday!!!!!

  24. Ramona says:

    ha, ha. That’ll work. Teach her to fool with ya! So, we should be seeing those pictures soon.

  25. FrannyP says:

    So please inform this city girl why the sheep is wearing a hot pink coat????

  26. Teresa says:

    I miss the BWF. We did not make the trip these past few years. Last time we went, Suzanne was on a float in the parade!
    My niece had a lamb again this year in the 4-H show. She got 3rd place in the heavy weight with her 145# “lamb”.
    It is fun to watch them leading around and sometimes being “led/dragged” around the ring. Miss Lady Ba-Baa got away and had to be tackeled I hear.

  27. Amanda's Mom says:

    LOL !!!!!
    The “I DON’T KNOW” picture is priceless.I get that alot from Amanda AND Madision.She told me that her brother Bradley had sent a text to Morgan about braiding her hair, so I was surprised when she came into the show ring and it wasn’t braided.SHAME ON THEM!!
    I would make them BOTH come and put the halter on Glory Bee,AND NO COOKIES FOR THEM ! Force them stand and watch Clover eat THEIR cookies!
    The 83rd National FFA Convention is taking place Oct. 20-23. It will be aired on RFD-TV channel. Watch and you might catch a glimpse of Amanda and Bradley.

  28. Amanda says:

    Working with animals helps condition me for Madison. Working with cattle involves a lot of patience, AS DOES THE BOYFRIEND!!!!! If I never make it over to the farm to break the calf, BLAME HIM!!! I don’t have a liscense and he is in charge of driving me around. But he isn’t always willing to share me with others… The promise of food may work on him… And just for the record, FFA ROCKS!!!!!

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