I’m feeling *yay me* about this week. I’ve been in a fog for a couple weeks, ever since we got back from vacation. Kinda staring at the wall and paralyzed on moving forward on any writing. I don’t know why, really. Or at least not one thing. Probably a combination of things–tired from completing five SIMs in the past year and a half, distracted by promotion for The Beast Within, scared, stressed, sure I’ll never sell again, I’M ALL WASHED UP, etc. It’s the typical in-flight turbulence that comes with being uncontracted. I’m used to it. Every couple of years I find myself in this position. I’m SURE my life is over…and yet my life is so exciting at the same time. Full of promise and potential. I’m ready to touch the clouds. Anything can happen. INCLUDING DISASTER.
There are ways to avoid the uncontracted state, of course. You should write new proposals between contracted books. Unfortunately, I’m not good at multi-tasking on stories and I haven’t done anything about it because….. Shhh! I like being uncontracted occasionally. NO ONE CAN TELL ME WHAT TO DO WHEN I’M UNCONTRACTED. I can do whatever I want, like write a flying pig story.
I’ve got tons of ideas I’m excited about (always do) but couldn’t seem to lift a finger. Finally forced myself to start writing this week (inspired by the flying pig), and wrote several false starts on the flying pig before I finally found the real start. As usual, there is no writing problem that can’t be solved by WRITING. I wasn’t going to find the solution by staring at the wall. I found the solution by writing it wrong, deleting, writing it wrong again, deleting, then finally writing it right. It’s one of the most difficult things to do when you’re in a paralyzed mode, but it works. And now, hey, I’m going to finish a short proposal on it this weekend. (Will the flying pig fly? Stay tuned for updates on flying pig reaction.) Next week I’ve got workshop prep and other stuff to get ready to leave for RWA. When I get back, I’ll do another proposal. And I am LOST on that story right now, but I know what I have to do: write it wrong, delete it, write it wrong again, delete it, then write it again.
I wasn’t going to blog about this, then I thought–hey, there are probably people out there who think that after you’ve sold 22 books, it’s all easy. Hello, it’s not. It’s always hard. But God, it’s so beautiful.