I Thought Ramps Were For Trucks


West Virginia is the ramps capital of the world!!!! And to think, I had never heard of them…… They have entire festivals devoted to ramps here. People hike into the hills and woods here to dig them up, then sell them on the side of the road…………. where other people buy them and actually EAT THEM!! Ramps are a wild leek that thrive in the Appalachian mountains and valleys…….and they SMELL SO BAD YOU WANT TO BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN AFTER YOU COOK THEM IN IT. (Notice the rubber gloves when handling them!!!! They are like TOXIC WASTE!!!)

So we took them OUTSIDE for preparation.

And then into the cellar porch to cook them. We keep the kittens in the cellar porch. I was afraid we would kill them with the odor.

Mary sauteed the ramps in olive oil and butter, with a little salt and pepper, in an iron skillet on the gas stove in the cellar porch then served them over fresh-baked french bread.

Do they look pretty or WHAT? Mary is a gourmet chef! She can even make toxic waste look beautiful!! She decorated them with japonica quince blossoms.

They say ramps will make your skin and breath stink for days………… Clues to this week’s contest question: My cousin’s mother Georgia has eaten ramps before but said she was all done with ramps. My cousin Mark brought us the ramps but said he wasn’t planning to try the ramps. The dog will eat anything. Mary cooked the ramps and turned them into the most beautiful dish you’ve ever seen. What happened then?

For an autographed copy of your pick from my contemporary backlist–who risked life, limb and bad breath to try the ramps? (One winner will be selected from the correct guessers on Monday!)

1) Me, Mary, and the dog.
2) Me, Mary, and Georgia.
3) Mary and the dog.
4) No one–we burned the farmhouse down and moved on.
5) Me, Mary, and my cousin Mark who gave us the ramps.
6) The dog.


  1. Jennifer Yates says:

    Ooh…a tough question…I never do well on these giveaway questions… :hissyfit:

    Hmm…I am going to GUESS choice number 5.

  2. Maureen says:

    I am going to guess #1. If you ate them, how do they taste?

  3. Fannie M Wiggins says:

    I am very familiar with ramps. My late husband used to eat them and he got to sleep on the couch for a week. He fried them with potatoes and ate them with cornbread and buttermilk. Yuck!!!:yuck: So I am going to say # 3. Mary and the dog. Of course it could be # 1 since you have an inquiring mind. Yep I’m changing my answer to #1. My mind is not that inquiring, thank goodness.:no:

  4. Minna says:

    My guess is number 2.

  5. catslady says:

    They look so pretty – I’ll go with 5 – giving you credit for being brave and the dog credit for probably paying attention to his nose :rotfl:

  6. Estella Kissell says:

    I live in the west and have never heard of ramps. They look nasty.
    I’ll guess #3.

  7. Tori Lennox says:

    Well, looks like ramps aren’t what I thought they were. They look truly disgusting!

  8. Cheryl S. says:

    Gonna go with #3 . . . no reason. It’s a total guess! 🙂

  9. Gina says:

    I’m going to go with three. The dog will eat anything, and Mary cooked them, so I’m thinking she at least tried them.

  10. ruby55 says:

    Before I try to second-guess myself in my option, I’ll say #5. You tried them because, after all, your friend wanted to share a delicacy with you. Of course, she ate them because she obviously must like them and I think your attorney-cousin caved in because–well, he was too macho to refuse.

    And if what you said about body-odor, etc. was true, there were likely 3 adults sleeping alone for a while.:yuck:

    Now, if I can live behind a beauty parlor with my delicate sensory system, I think you guys can handle something like a garlicy-leek smell. It’s not that bad, is it? I love leeks and I love garlic. I just hate the smell of cooking fish. :mrgreen:

    Hope you enjoyed them after all. I’d have loved to try them.

  11. Laurie G says:

    I’ve never heard of ramps! They look beautiful but if they smell bad…I’m going with #6 only the dog actually ate them!!

  12. Michelle says:

    I don’t know that I’d want to eat that many of them! But maybe if you chopped them up and used them like green onions? Ick. I’d guess #2.

  13. Jeanette Jackson says:

    I’ll guess #1

  14. Joyce says:

    Going to go with #3, Mary and the dog. From what you described you couldn’t pay me to eat them.:thumbsdown:

  15. KimW says:

    I’m going to guess it’s #5 and I bet they weren’t that bad to eat. haha! For your sake, I hope I’m right. haha!

  16. Madeline says:

    Six, definitely 6, then MAYBE you burned the house down when he was done!

  17. TeresaH says:

    Well, I’ll say #1 :fryingpan:

  18. Marcy says:

    I’ll say #3, Mary and the dog. :rotfl:

  19. Melissa says:

    #1 You, Mary, and the dog :yes:

    Taste like chicken? 😆

  20. Stacey says:

    What? Someone ate them?! From your description, that surprised me. I didn’t see an option that everyone passed. LOL

    I’m going to guess #3.

  21. marelou says:

    if they reek as bad as you say…I’m going with #4

  22. Lis says:

    Oh this one’s a toughie. I’m torn between #1 and 5, but leaning to the first one.

  23. Danica says:

    I’m going with number two, because I think you probably were nice enough to try them, and I think Mary had to have tried them if she knows how to cook them.

    Although burning the farmhouse down has lots of merit in that it would be lots of fun.

  24. Carol says:

    I think you tried them so I’m going with #1.

  25. Alessia says:

    I am going to go with #1.