Sultan, with Harem


Morgan hates the goose. HATES HIM. No good reason. She thinks he’s scary, but he’s NOT, I swear! I only have the one American Blue male goose. I had three other geese, but they were killed by raccoons before I moved from Stringtown Rising. I had reserved some American Blues for this spring, but the reservation fell through when they didn’t have enough to fill orders. I really really wanted more American Blues, which are hard to find, because they are such nice geese…. I’m not sure what I’m going to do now, but I need more geese. Apparently…..

Conversation with Morgan yesterday afternoon–

Me: “Morgan, I have to tell you something about the goose.” Because, like, I had to tell someone.

Morgan: “He’s dead?” (Certain light of anticipation in her eyes.)

Me: “No! He just….did something.”

Morgan: :::long pause::: “HE RAPED A CHICKEN!”

Farm children, they grow up so early.

Me: “YES!!!!!!!!”


Me: “He’s just lonely….”

Really. He had sex with a chicken. And I watched it. I don’t know who is a bigger pervert, me or the goose!

A farm, it is so disturbing to the human mind at times…. AND WHO KNOWS WHAT DUMPLIN HAS SEEN.


  1. MousE says:

    LOL, that’s funny,

    a bit disturbing, ahem, but

    FUNNY. 😀

  2. cin13 says:

    You are a scream! Thanks for the laugh!

  3. Cheryl LeMay says:

    I got a goose from a lady who ended up with only a single goose but also had chickens. He thought he was a chicken (I have geese and ducks too). He would go in from the rain with the chickens, never went in the pool etc. Eventually he realized that he wasn’t a chicken and bonded with the other waterfowl. You need to get him other geese. Toulouse geese are similar in color and more readily available. You can always try again next year for American Blues.

  4. Minna says:

    Oh dear. Sounds like you need to find him at least one lady friend and soon, whether she’s American Blue or not. :chicken:

  5. ibpallets (Sharon B.) says:


  6. rhubarbrose says:

    That is too funny!!! That picture with Dumplin in the background is brilliant!

  7. NancyL says:

    I wonder what the chicken thought? Reminds me of seeing my neutered male cat trying to mate with my spayed female cat – I was so horrified I nervously asked my vet about it.

  8. Sue, a Florida Farm Girl says:

    Can you hear me laughing all the way down here?? Find the poor boy a girlfriend!

  9. mamawolf says:

    Between this and an e-mail I received today I can’t stop laughing. Poor chicken must be wondering what the world is coming to. Find him a mate even if you have to kidnap a Canadian from the river.

  10. Old Geezer says:

    What you have going here is the beginning of the true biologically-formed Turduken flock.

    Ok, so it’s really a Turgoosen, but who’s being picky. Now you need a turkey to complete the DNA.

    You’ll make millions!

  11. BethanyJean says:

    We have a male duck that violates some of our hens from time to time, the first time I saw him do it I couldn’t look anyway and afterwords I called my mom to tell her!!! It’s like a train wreck you don’t wanna look away but you just can’t help yourself!

  12. GA_in_GA says:

    Boys will be boys? :no:

  13. Lallie says:

    You may need to find a therapist for your chickens!

  14. GrammieEarth says:

    Sometimes, one just needs a duck.
    I’m thinking you need more ducks. Morgan will cope 🙂
    Hilarious post!

  15. ibpallets (Sharon B.) says:

    Since I read this post this morning, The Sultans of Swing (Dire Straits) has been stuck in my head…all day…long…
    “And Harry doesn’t mind if he doesn’t make the scene
    He’s got a daytime job he’s doing alright
    He can play honky tonk just like anything
    Saving it up for Friday night
    With the Sultans with the Sultans of Swing ”

    Thanks a lot!!!! LOL

  16. Lana says:

    Love Old Geezer’s comment! I was going for the lesser species – goosecken…..

  17. SpinnersEndFarm says:

    He is one handsome gander!

  18. milesawayfarm says:

    Reminds me of that scene in Barbara Kingsolver’s book “Animal, Vegetable, Miracle” when she talks about the turkeys mating, and she watches, and then says, “be honest, wouldn’t you have watched too”?
    I grew up with geese, and they used to knock me down and bite me (I was all of 3, and small for my age). I hated them too. But a friend has some and she loves loves loves them. They make great watch dogs.

  19. Janb says:

    We have a feral peacock who moved in with our chickens last summer and he has one hen that he is particularly *fond* of. sigh

  20. jodiezoeller says:

    Is Mr. Goose still pining for his lady hens?

Add Your Thoughts