Acme Driving School

Jan
15

The vehicle (my Jeep).

The instructor (my cousin).

The adversary, my driveway….

….and the road.

Me: “What if we roll over the hill?”

Him: “If you start sliding, stay off the brake so you can steer.”

Me: “What if we go into a ditch?”

Him: “Just take it easy. And step on the gas already.”

Me: “What if we careen off a cliff?”

Him: “Then we’ll call Peewee to come get your car.”

Me: “WHAT IF WE DIE?!”

Him: “WHAT IF A SPACESHIP LANDS ON OUR HEADS?!”

Me: “Now you understand.”





Comments

  1. Hrist says:

    If a spaceship lands on your head, don’t forget to take pictures!

  2. MissWiniW says:

    So jealous that you have a Jeep – my dream car is a red Jeep Wrangler. No idea why. I sometimes think it’s because the twins from the Sweet Valley High books had one, haha.

  3. Rose H says:

    As we’ve had no spaceship reports, I’m presuming you made it up the hill? 😆 😆

  4. Sara says:

    You are just to funny……but I do understand fear mine is heights as in ladder 3rd rung…and up…But your cousin seems like a calm man and will help you to get the inner strenght and piece to drive up and down this hill/driveway

  5. skippymom says:

    He sounds like fun. I know it is hard, but hang in there.

    I saw on the news this morning that you are set for more snow [I know you already know this, no surprise] I was hoping you would get the warmer weather and the rain to erase all the snow.

    Don’t worry – you are well stocked and Spring will be here before you know it.

    Take care and good thoughts.

  6. Tracey In Paradise Pa says:

    tooooo funny!!!

  7. Patricia Herman says:

    I loved this conversation made me laugh out loud when I read it. So did you manage to get your Jeep home? Inquiring minds want to know!!!! Or did the spaceship land? lol

  8. Jan says:

    In all these years, I’ve never heard a West Virginian use “already” at the end of a sentence with that same meaning, “Step on the gas already.” Are you sure your cousin is really from Wayne County? After reading today’s post, I’m thinking maybe he was brought there by aliens when the spaceship landed on your head!!!!

    I’m with you on that driving in the snow on those tiny roads with steep embankments. Conquer this and you will be ready to drive in the Andes Mountains!!!!

  9. Diane says:

    Too funny. You just need to realize that you can drive up and down your drive way and be ok. And you are not going that fast in the first place so you will not slide off the road too far or start flying down the side. Just keep doing it until you relize one day that its not as bad as you thought in the first place!!! You make cheese lady you can drive on a snow covered road too.

  10. Johanna says:

    Well thank goodness for your calm cousin! Hope you went up and down the driveway and over the road all afternoon until you felt more confident. It’s no good being trapped back there.

    Good for you, Suzanne!

  11. Runningtrails says:

    That’s funny! I hope it went well!

    Personally, I would absolutely LOVE to be stuck at home for a week, provided I had all the supplies I needed.

    Will never happen, I am within walking distance (2 km) to Walmart and a huge 24 hour grocery store. It is convenient, sometimes too convenient.

    Your cousin sounds like a nice guy.

  12. CALAMITY CREEK says:

    Thank Heavens for calm cousins, for Jeeps that can navigate snowy roads and for the beautiful snow itself. I’m betting you did fine, Suzanne…you’re a smart cookie…but your lovely cousin may have gone home with a migraine.
    Yep…Spring will be here before we know it. And then summer in it’s green and giving lushness. Then Autumn. And then WINTER again with all it’s challenges and rewards. Life is a big wheel, isn’t it?
    Enjoy your newfound knowledge of Snow Driving!

  13. CindyP says:

    😆 😆 Assuming there were no spaceships, or this post would have taken a whole other direction!! 😆 😆

    And the sun looks beautiful through the trees and on the snow!! We didn’t get the sun :no: maybe today!

  14. Dianna McBride says:

    Oh my goodness, Suzanne! Today’s post reminds me SO much of a conversation I had with a neighbor about 25 or 30 years ago. In order to get to our housing development you had to come up a very long and steep hill…and I DO mean STEEP! There was only one of four seasons that it ever phased Deb or I…yep…winter. If one were to lose control and go OVER the hill instead of DOWN it, one would end up in the middle of Route 50…an extremely busy highway in the area we lived. And like your road…NO…I repeat…NO guard rails. When we were discussing the problem one day, Deb said, “I’ve finally conquered my fear of that dreaded hill in the winter.” So excited to learn her remedy I asked her what it was. Her reply was, “Well, I thought to myself, ‘what is the worst thing that could happen to me?’. At first I thought it would be dieing and then I realized that wasn’t the worst thing that could happen…the worst thing would be if I went over the enbankment and lived to tell about it.” Happy driving, Suzanne.

  15. BethAnn says:

    Good for you Suzanne! You need to conquer this fear!

  16. Melinda says:

    I don’t think the “normal” part of the road scares you as much as that narrow part with the steep cliff ……sooooooo I have a suggestion…walk that part and train the jeep to follow you! :sun: :sun:
    Okay, perhaps you better just listen to 52’s advice instead…..I think that Jeep would be as stubborn as Clover!!!
    Drive Safely!!

  17. Chic says:

    Suzanne once you do this right a few times …trust me….you’ll be a pro at it in no time and won’t even flinch when you have to drive down or up that driveway. And the road will seem tame! Hang in there girl! :hungry2: (pitchfork!)

  18. KentuckyFarmGirl says:

    Go Suzanne! Go Suzanne! Go Suzanne!!!!

  19. Holly says:

    Put it in low and go. You’ll do fine. :sun: :sun:

  20. Mary says:

    Your cousin really did give you some good advice. If you start sliding take your foot off the gas pedal, so you can steer. That’s not as easy as it sounds, because your first impulse (or mine, at least) is to put my foot on the brakes. Just take it extra slow. You don’t have to worry that you’re going too slow as there’s no one behind you to worry about. Practice a little each day if you can. It may never be easy, but it will be more possible. Great post!

  21. Doris says:

    The house we raised our kids in was way up on top of a hill. We had to use a common drive with the neighbors. Not a long drive but quite steep.
    We learned to put the car in neutral going down. No longer did the motor pull the car down and I felt more in control. Some people don’t agree with me but driving to work 20 miles every day I learned when coming up to a red light, just put it in neutral and I always was able to stop. It seems the going down is scarier than trying to get up.
    Once or twice we couldn’t get up our drive (before front wheel drive) and we had to park elsewhere and walk. Glad to be off that hill.

  22. kerri says:

    Good for you, Suzanne! Go ahead and conquer that fear! Your cousin is a good egg to help you do it. And you will! I’m sure :shimmy: A calming presence is just what you need. 🙂

  23. Debnfla3 says:

    I would be scared spitless!!!

    Deb

  24. NorthCountryGirl says:

    You can do it! If 52, your cousin, and others can do it, you can too.

  25. jan 'n' tn says:

    Winter Driving 101—
    Please tell us that you let him take pictures!!!!can you imagine??
    Suzanne you have a great cousin. No matter what the reason, he was willing and able to help you face this fear.
    Did we all see how bundled up he was? I wondered if he had tucked the crash helmet under a ball cap. Now that would have been funny!
    Car—-check
    Snow—check
    Big padded jacket—-check
    Instructors crash helmet—check

  26. Jo says:

    Suzanne, it looks like I drive that exact Jeep. We have a dark green ’98 Jeep (yours is probably newer). It has part-time 4wd and full-time 4wd…right?

    When you’re going up and down your drive/lane….just put it in either part-time or full-time 4wd, go slow and easy, do NOT put your foot on the brake otherwise you are going to slide. If you do start sliding, TAKE YOUR FOOT OFF THE BRAKE! I know it’s backwards. 😆

    Just take a couple days and do some practice runs. Trust your jeep, become one with the jeep…. 😆 Breathe deeply, but don’t hyperventilate. :bugeyed: You’ll be fine, in time.

    I would agree with the person that said to put it in low, that will keep you going slow without having to use the brakes. Then you won’t feel like you are “careening” down your drive…

    You’ll be ok, sweetie. :snuggle:

  27. cgReno says:

    When driving in snow, you are definetly ripe for alien abduction…I agree with prior comment “Get Pics”!

  28. Ms E says:

    Hooray for Suzanne – you go girl!!

  29. Joan says:

    I think your husband needs to buy a plow blade for the Jeep. My husband bought one for my Explorer and now the driveway is always clean after a snowfall.

    I don’t have any problem driving in deep snow, as long as I keep it in 4 wheel drive. There is no swerving that way. Good luck.

  30. Nancy in Iowa says:

    At least this winter you stocked up on tin foil – keep a roll in the Jeep so you can wrap it around your head and communicate with the aliens!!!

  31. Jen R (emeraldsunshine.org) says:

    Haha – I hope you actually pushed the gas at some point in that lesson! 😀

  32. SuzieQ says:

    Spaceship landing on your head is one thing, picking you up is another. Maybe it could transport you past the scary part! :dancingmonster:

  33. B. Ruth says:

    Thought I saw in an older post a tractor at your house?
    I’d be buying me a blade for that ‘baby’…..and get those boys to run it up and down your road and driveway…I don’t like ‘kissing trees’ with my car either! And in years I’ve kissed a couple when it was icy on our curvy drive…I’m not one to stay home forever snow or no snow…LOL
    My dh and boys used to take the Troy-built and blade and push snow away in the area of the tire grooves…helped some…
    Our problem was the county scrapers they would scrape and leave the mess at the end of the county road where our 1/2 mile hilly driveway started and block our drive…Took a few well placed ‘conversations’ to get them to stop doing it. After a few times…when the next snow arrived we got a surprise, they actually scraped our private drive…how sweet!

  34. Janis says:

    I see a tractor. I would take THAT to town, on bad days, instead of a SUV. Thats what we do here in rural Vermont. Of course ALL our tractors have 4 wheel drive too. Does yours ?
    Keep up the good work~!

    https://www.tailgait.blogspot.com

  35. leneskate says:

    WOW well I think you will do fine. I have a little car here in Northern Minnesota with 2 ft on the ground and do just fine.
    I love you site so glad I found you!! :shimmy:

  36. Anne says:

    at some point you may HAVE to brake when it is slippery…car coming at you on a narrow road, deer runs out in front of you, etc…learn how to PUMP the brakes, and go as slow as you want until you gain confidence. Slow is good. Way to go Suzanne!!!!!

  37. Tobey says:

    Good for you, Suzanne – I am so glad for your own peace of mind that you are facing your fears head on.

    Sets a good example for the kids, too.

    Keep at it, and don’t give up. You can do it!

    As I sit in a finally warm Fla…

  38. Yvonne M. says:

    Where’d the Jeep come from? You always show the Ford. (Maybe you traded.) I learned to drive in a Jeep Wagoneer – put that sucker in low range and it would crawl anywhere you wanted to go! Conquer the snowy road Suzanne!

  39. melinda says:

    uh…suzanne….could you wiggle your fingers and say hi so we know you survived the trip? No comments from you seems unusual

  40. Michele Messier says:

    I think its important to feel comfortable driving a snowy steep road, you did the right thing! :fairy: :fairy:

  41. RosieJo says:

    This is why I live in a lovely subdivision in town!

  42. Amy says:

    Way to funny!! BTW love love love the new picture of you!!!

  43. Julieanna says:

    Suzanne, I feel your pain. :yes: I am used to driving in snow…. but now living in East Tennessee and driving to work into North Carolina, I am terrified of driving off a cliff. Very, very few guardrails and no pullover lanes….. 😮 But, you can do it…looks like you have a good teacher, or at least a fearless one. Drive on!!!

  44. debbie says:

    Isn’t West Virgina home of the “Mothman”? Doesn’t that mean the aliens already have landed? Any way, Courage Points to you for tackling the problem and to your cousin for helping.

    Strange, that’s something I remember my husband talking about when he visited W.Va. was the lack of guard rails on the mountain roads. I think I’d just ride a mule. Oh, I’d have to. I don’t drive.

  45. Gail says:

    Suzanne, you are so funny! You know you can conquer the driveway and road… after all, you are a REAL farmer now! You can do anything!

  46. Window On The Prairie says:

    LOL! Having driven on snow for over 20 years, it’s kinda 2nd nature. Just thank your lucky stars you aren’t driving a rear wheel drive car – sheez, that was like driving on ice skates, just awful. But a rule of thumb for driving in snow, take it slow, no quick turns, starts or stops, and pretend you don’t have brakes – so slow down a lot before you step on the brakes. Pretend you have a raw egg in the seat next to you as a passenger, and you don’t want it to fall off the seat and break. Just take it easy- you’ll do fine.
    Suzanne 🙂

Add Your Thoughts