Ten Worst


Yesterday, I started making a list of the 10 worst things about living in the country. What is that, like a negative affirmation?

1. Mud. Seriously, there’s so much mud here. Though, it only lasts for about half the year, and all the rain that makes the mud makes everything grow like some kind of sub-tropical paradise. Mud – that’s what chore boots were made for, right?

2. No cell service (on our farm). Or at least, I can’t get any. I hear tell some people can get a bar out by the chicken house, and sometimes Morgan has been known to hang out her window to find a bar. But realistically speaking, we have no cell service. I keep my cell phone in my purse in case I need it when I go somewhere. But, I hardly ever have to charge it, which is good because I’m always forgetting where I put my charger, and I’m not attached/obsessed with my cell phone. In fact, I don’t really care about it most of the time since I hardly ever leave the farm where I can use it.

3. Poop. There’s poop everywhere here! I can identify poop. I’m like a POOP EXPERT. Show me some poop, I dare you. I’ll tell you what breed of animal made it. I can even tell you if they’re sick! I’m the Poopinator! Call me Dr. Poop!

Then I started laughing and I couldn’t remember why I was trying to make this list, if I ever had a reason to begin with, and I realized that all I was doing was arguing with myself. The fact is, there aren’t 10 worst things about living in the country.

I’m not sure there’s even one.


  1. Katharina says:

    You have the secret of a happy life…a good attitude…even in the mud…and other squishy stuff.

  2. Blessings says:

    Suzanne, You crack me up..LOL

  3. kj says:

    sometimes my face hurts from the constant grin I have while reading your blogs.

  4. rileysmom says:

    Suzanne, I thought I had the “market” on mud! I think this year it will be 10 months of mud and 2 months of dust! Can’t we cook up a mud masque? :happyflower:

  5. NorthCountryGirl says:

    There are no “worst” things about living in the country. Having been a country girl all my life, I can say it’s the best place there is to live. Here’s one country girl that’s glad she’s country!! :happyflower:

  6. Luann says:

    I have been a small town girl all my life and moved to the country the day after Christmas. I love it out here, including the mud! 🙂


    All that mud would be a paradise to a little kid! Mud pies and mud cookies and mud cakes….endless possibilities!
    And poop! Did you know you can actually make jewelry with dried and sanitized poop??? My sister lives in the country in Missouri and there was a lady in that area who did just that. She used it like modeling clay and baked it in the oven then painted it and SOLD IT.
    I just read a perfect quote for a country woman…’A Pessimist is one who sees the difficulty in every opportunity and an Optimist is one who sees the opportunity in every difficulty.’ (can’t remember who said it but I thought it was very good!)
    Good day to all the women who share your life, Suzanne, if only through this blog.

  8. wildcat says:

    ROTFL @ The Poopinator! Too funny! 😆

  9. proudmary says:

    You can take the girl out of the country, but you cann’t take the country out of the girl.That’s my motto.

  10. TinaBell says:

    I’m a transplanted city girl who lives just outside of town, mostly surrounded by crop fields, and I LOVE IT!! If I had my druthers I’d be even further out, ideally surrounded by woods…ahhh, that would be heaven in my estimation. And of course I’d have chickens and goats and ducks, too! *sigh* Someday…!
    There are cows the next field over and I can smell their poop, does that count for anything? Ha ha ha! :shimmy:

  11. prayingpup says:

    The only negative thing about the country, here, is: the dish for internet and tv go out in a storm (I guess that could happen in town too) and no tornado sirens. . . . other than that – NO NEGATIVES! I love the country life. Oh, and a positive? You can undress without closing the shades! 😆

  12. holstein woman says:

    On this farm the mud is mixed with the poop. Do you know that a cow can poop 30 gallons a day????? The book didn’t say if it is a BIG cow or small. I have 4 dairy cows, boy am I glad someone else is doing the milking now, tee hee :snoopy: . Not to mention 5 gallons of urine for every outpour. What goes in comes out??
    I was beginning to think you were rethinking farming Suzanne, I’m glad I was wrong. :dancingmonster:

  13. cabynfevr says:

    I’m happy you couldn’t find 10 things! Have a wonderful weekend Dr. Poop! :dancingmonster:

  14. CarrieJ says:

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! So funny…..!

  15. Granny Trace says:

    :dancingmonster: TO FUNNY!!!
    Dr.Poop!! When I first moved to country I actually bought a book called who shat that..Great book for parties.
    You are toooooo funny!!
    Granny Trace

  16. Window On The Prairie says:

    Oh good, I’m not the only weirdo then. I can identify any kind of poop whether from a farm animal or wild. Rabbit, deer, coyote, you name it.

  17. Windflower says:

    @prayingpup My mom used to think that way until the day she was walking in front of her bedroom window, nekkid, and was looking right into the eyes of a hunter that had set up a deer stand across the road on the neighbor’s property. There was a good hundred yards in between them, but he had binoculars… :happyfeet:

  18. patchkat says:

    Have to tell you, I love the animal photos…the expression on the animal’s faces is priceless! Heard your “Country Living” tip on our local station this morning on the “Living the Country Life” segment!!! You rock girl! They plugged your website pretty good :-), but I so wished there was a way to add to your credits! YOu’re way more than a published writer, lol.

    Susan ~ Patchkat (TX)

  19. Sandra says:

    Actually two things come to mind…TICKS and Copperheads….but one has to have a little excitement–right? I wouldn’t trade growing up in the country for any thing.

  20. yvonnem says:

    I loved this, Dr. Poop! Made my day. 😆

  21. Runningtrails says:

    We LOVE living in the country! We will never,ever live in the city again!

  22. outbackfarm says:

    This is what I have been thinking about too. There is really not too many things. Well, except flies. Yeah, flies are my worst enemy here. Other than that, I’m good. I love that when I head home from town that all the cars start turning off here and there and then I am the only one on the road. Then I am home and all my critters greet me. Well, they are actually hollering at me for being gone so long and what is taking me so long to feed them. Then it’s so nice and peaceful and I love it here.

  23. lavenderblue says:

    I agree with outbackfarm, the only bad thing, as I recall from my country days, is the flies. But not the house and barn flies, there are cures for those. It’s those wee tiny black flies. I don’t know if everyone has them or just those of us lucky enough to live near swamps.

    They are about the size of the head of a pin and leave a bite as big as a house, usually on your forehead or under your hair on top of your head.

  24. Barbee says:

    Hi Suzanne, I bet you already know this so I will just leave a little reminder that cell phones use battery power even when they are turned off. Keep it charged, or you might find yourself out somewhere and needing to use the phone only to have it run down.

  25. Chicken Crossing says:

    I LOVE you attitude, Suzanne!

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