Yesterday, in an extraordinary fit of domesticity (well, not including ME–I play a SUPERVISORY ROLE), I determined that the house should be cleaned up. Since I figured I did my part when I gave birth, I sought out the CHILDREN who owed me for the great pain and agony involved in giving birth, not to mention the serious lack of Hustler body I’ve had ever since.
I just meant for them to clean upstairs. I found the two oldest, my boys, and set them to work. This incurred much shock and dismay. What, I want them to CLEAN?
They have been vampires, lounging about in their noon to three AM world, since school let out. I expected them to do WORK now??
(Drawing credit: ExplodingDog)
The 12-year-old moved about in stoic resignation like a robot. The 14-year-old promptly began stomping and mouthing off–how dare I interrupt his lovely summer of watching TV and playing computer games??? MEAN MOMMY. Was I having a temper tantrum, he posed? And why, he pondered, did I care if the UPSTAIRS was cleaned up when the DOWNSTAIRS was so dirty??
I’LL SHOW YOU A TEMPER TANTRUM.:whip:
Yes, the little darling got to clean DOWNSTAIRS, too. After all, he was correct. If I cared about the upstairs being cleaned, then the downstairs should be cleaned, too. By him.
Meanwhile, the stoic 12-year-old lost his cool when I found him UNloading a dishwasher of dirty dishes. Um, sorry, dear, but those are DIRTY, so they must be put BACK and washed. The bowels of hell heard his dismay. He was promptly assigned more chores–vacuum the living room! (Twice!) Sweep the front hall! (Twice!)
When all their chores were completed, and I had finally managed to (for the umpteenth time) rouse the vampire 9-year-old daughter out of bed, I sent the boys on their merry way. I informed the daughter of her list of chores that had been saved just for her.
Instant objections ensued.
I said to my 12-year-old son, just making his way up the stairs to his freedom, “Perhaps you want to tell your little sister what will happen if she complains?”
He smiled at his sister. “You’ll get candy!!”
Don’t forget the fifth installment of my free eHarlequin online PAX read — Hot Target! Click on the green “read” button at the bottom and scroll down to Hot Target. TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!